First things first, let’s start by redefining forgiveness. We have been taught that to forgive means to let the other person off the hook. It thus makes sense that our society is full of angry, resentful people that can’t let go of hurt. What if forgiveness had nothing to do with the other person? It’s really about letting go of the resentment and the pain that’s killing us. Remember, that if it doesn’t involve the other person, it doesn’t require you to even communicate your forgiveness to the other. What you are truly doing is freeing yourself from self-inflicted poison.
Honesty is always the best policy. Is it not? Have you ever withheld the truth? Was it worthwhile to do so? Did it pay dividends or create havoc to lie? Did you justify that you weren’t really lying? How often do we deceive ourselves and others? Why all the questions? Because we always know the difference and being truthful equals being trustworthy. What would the world look like if everyone only told the truth? Can we heal our environment, our economy, our homes with the truth? I believe, as others do, that we can heal our bodies with the truth.
Confrontation brings up fear and, at times, provides a severe lack of clarity around what we truly want. Identify the distinction between the confrontation being about you or another person. If it’s about another person, bring neutrality, gather information around the problem and solution and deliver it in a way that doesn’t exacerbate the problem. If it’s about you, the fear or lack of clarity is likely about some need not being met or may be in danger of not being met. Clarity comes from seeing past what has yet to transpire and envisioning possibilities other than our worst fears.
The “Aha” moment comes and goes. It is a matter of what we do with it. I have developed two formulas that can support you. First, take: Aha+Nothing=Breakdown; nothing meaning that nothing is done with the idea; breakdown meaning that nothing changes, things stay the same or get worse. Alternatively, take: Aha+Committed Action=Breakthrough. Committed Action are two supremely powerful words when married and adhered to. Look at your Breakdowns in life; you knew what to do, didn’t do anything, thus Breakdown. Conversely, look at your Breakthroughs; you knew what to do, took some form of Committed Action and Voila! Breakthrough!
This is simple, straight-forward direction. First: Raise your awareness and pay attention to who you are being with yourself and others. If it’s working, expand it; if it’s not working, (the world will let you know) knock it off! Second: Get busy at mastering, creating harmony and balance in all the domains of your life; do not sell out anywhere in your life! Third: Create and actively live into your dreams. Find that compelling purpose to get up every day, giving to others and receiving what the universe has to offer! The shorter version is known as: Be, Do Have.
Many of us are aware that we have little voices in our head; directing our mental traffic and often, unfortunately, suggesting paths not in alignment with our true desires. There are essentially two voices. The first, most often heard, represents our mediocrity. It might not always be the first to speak, by the way. That voice, our greatness, often speaks for our intuition. Learning to trust and harness one’s intuition is critical on the path to enlightenment. Some of the greatest wisdom I have ever received was to simply listen, only listen, to the little voices for thirty days straight.
Music speaks to us in many ways. Like communication, this refers to listening. As musicians or listeners, there is also a constant desire to express ourselves. How does that seemingly come about so easily for songwriters? From my personal experience, it isn’t always that simple. Yet, I have discovered along the way the importance of being open and availing myself to what surrounds me for inspiration. Sometimes the inspiration is pleasant, sometimes not so. Either way, the song eventually comes out as I listen for the melody, harmony and words. The gift is in relating our experiences for others effectively.
Our most reliable ally is our mindset. Unfortunately, it is also the source of many failures too. It has been said to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. The difference between Coaching and Therapy is that coaches are supporting you in knowing your past; raising awareness of its daily revisits so that your actions align with your dreams rather than with your fears, reasons and excuses. Generally, therapists are required for deeper inquiry into more serious psychological concerns; coaching is for those who simply let our past failures decide for us. Our mindset can be managed through coaching.
Thoughts can come like raindrops in a storm. Yet, at times, we desperately need to find shelter to weather the downpour. Ever find yourself reminded that you’ve complicated something? It is likely that we do that far more often than we are aware of. One quick way to manage your thoughts is to simply establish firm filters. Filters such as: Is this serving me? Is it my Greatness or my Mediocrity that is doing my thinking right now? If I were to take this thought quickly to conclusion…a clear mind can find much more room to be creative and productive.
We go for the big goal, find it to be too difficult to accomplish then we give up. Sound familiar? Its part of the human experience; how do successful people seemingly do it without breaking a sweat? It starts with the appropriate mindset. Next, go for simple goals to establish a habit of succeeding and having less risk while being attentive to the process. Being aware of our gifts and limitations are equally important. They make it look easy because their thoughts tell them it IS easy. What do your thoughts tell you? Are you paying attention to your thoughts?